The Quality of Friendship: Why quantity means nothing and quality means everything.

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Life is not about the quantity of friends you have. It is about the quality of friends you have…

Most of us, especially if we are millennials, like to keep tabs on the number of friends we have in our phone or social media profiles. We ask ourselves how many followers we have on Twitter, how many Facebook friends we have, and how many likes each of our posts on Instagram receive. But what if I told you that it’s not about the quantity of friends you have, but rather the quality of your friendships?

What does it mean to be a good friend?
There are a lot of ways to be a good friend, but the most important thing is to be there for them when they need you. A good friend will do anything in their power to help their friends out when they need it most. They are not judgmental, and they give constructive feedback instead of tearing people down. A good friend will tell you what you need to hear even if it’s hard to hear at first because they care about your well being more than anything else. Good friends don’t hold grudges and forgive quickly. They keep you grounded and remind you that things could always be worse. Lastly, good friends are always supportive no matter what kind of mood or situation they’re dealing with themselves.

Being a good friend requires effort
It is not easy to be a good friend. You have to put in the effort. It is important that you let your friend know they can count on you when they need help or just want to talk, even if it’s just for a few minutes over text message or by phone call. Friendships take time and effort, but the reward is worth it in the end because you will have someone who truly understands you like no one else does.

Good friends are worth the effort
Getting good friends is not easy, but it is worth the effort. They are worth the effort because they are there for you when you need them, they offer genuine advice, provide a shoulder to cry on, or even just an ear to listen to your problems. There is no relationship that could be more valuable than the one with your best friend. Good friends are hard work; but the end result- in terms of rewards- is well worth it. A life without close friends would be less enjoyable. Friends fill our lives with joy. Friends can give meaning to our days, lighten the burden of our worries and make life more beautiful. A quote from Elisabeth Kübler-Ross sums up this sentiment perfectly: It’s nice to have money and power and all those things, but what does any of that matter if you don’t have anybody to share it with?

How to be a good friend
How can you be a good friend?
1) Listen with your ears open and your mouth shut. Active listening is the foundation for any good friendship, so make sure you’re listening to what they’re saying, not just waiting for your turn to speak. And when it’s not appropriate to talk, give them space. 2) Accept them for who they are in all their flaws and imperfections. We are all flawed humans, after all! 3) Be there when they need you–even if it’s inconvenient or difficult to do so–and don’t judge them as a person because they need help sometimes; that just makes you a good friend!

Being a good friend brings rewards
Being a good friend is more than just being there for someone when they need you. Being a good friend is being there for them unconditionally, no matter what, without trying to get anything in return. It’s about picking up the phone or sending that text message to see how their day went, even if you don’t really know what to say. It’s about doing something nice for them without expecting anything in return because it makes you feel happy knowing you made them smile or feel better in some way. It’s about saying I love you even when they’re going through a rough patch, because deep down inside, they need to hear those words.

Dr. Sajeev Dev
Dr. Sajeev Dev
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